Monday, February 20, 2006

Sheva Bruchos

As my blooging time is pretty limited lately, yet a new post is due, I will just bring my point across, and you can all fill in on it.

Sheva Bruchos.

First of all, my idea of Sheva bruchos would be, instead of having one every night after the wedding, it should rather be spread apart over the year, like, lets say one every 4-6 weeks, wouldn’t that be more enjoyable, you would have a chance to rest inbetween one and the other, you would be able to arrange a babysitter properly, you wouldn’t have to prepare meals at home JUST for the kids at home, You would have time to get dressed properly, you wouldn’t need 6 nice winter suits and nothing for a summer event, You would be able to follow up on “whats new” since we saw each others last time,the Chusson Kallah will be more “with it” at the later ones, and so on… these are just a few.

What bothers me most, is when people try to impress the other side, of how Chusiv their Mishpuchah is, and it is usually done in stupid ways, like getting all the brothers n uncles to give a Drushah, on various things , from the grand question of twice the lushon simcah in Smameach Te’samach or why the Bruchah of “Asher Yutzar” finds its place between the 7 Bruchos, and so on and so forth, these mind boggling wonders, which didn’t really bother any one in the fist place, let alone listening to a whole pe’shetel for 30 minutes. Now if that’s not bad enough, the father of the one who is “impressing” now, gets up every 2 minutes and knocks on the mechitzah for the woman to tame down and listen in,, hello… if its not your son speaking, you wouldn’t listen either, so what exactly do you expect from the ladies who came to enjoy themselves? (for as much as it can be). No one came out here to listen to drushas, even if he is the biggest Lamdan in the best Kollel for over 13 and a half years, no one is willing to pay babysitting an extra half hour, just so you can feel you really made a statement tonight about your family.

I really did have a good laugh for when the father of the chusson was the chairman and he welcomed all the guests as they walked in, it was interesting to see how he welcomed those who were centered around his busy Torah schedule, like, Brichim haboim, for my middle of the day chavrusah for eight years, reb…, and for reb.. who we just finished shas at the nacht seder with.. , oh I think Reb shimon is leaving already cause he has to wake me at 4;00 in the morning for our Shiur….

ONE BIG “DUH”!!!!

57 Comments:

At 2/20/2006 4:50 PM, Blogger SemGirl said...

Well, maybe if they didn't have that silly Mehitza in the first place. I was at a Sheva Brochas last week, in Lakewood, with men on one side of the room and women on the other with the Choson/Calla in a table in the center, and no Mehitza.

Everyone was listening to all the Droshas, it was very nice, and you didn't have intensity and STRESS that exists by many of these things.

JUST BE NORMAL !!!

 
At 2/20/2006 6:11 PM, Blogger Moochy said...

Sem, I thought you meant like sitting all together :) well it would be enjoyable, but I doubt they will listen to drushes ;)

 
At 2/20/2006 6:41 PM, Blogger Anonymous said...

If the sheva broches would be spread it through the year, how do you imagine it would look:

1. At one of them the kallah may be in her 9th month and her water may break.
2. What are the chances that the chosson and kallah are still getting along?
3. The mechutunim will not be trying to impress each other, but kill each other, because one owes the other one money.
4. The younger sister of the chossen got married a month ago, the younger brother of the kallah got married 3 months ago, and you have to coordinate that sheva broches doesn't come out the same night.
5. The kallah is attached to a nursing baby, and everytime someone comes over to say mazel tov, the baby looks up... you know what its like.

You get my point, your idea is not so great if you think into it.

By the way, so who got married?

 
At 2/21/2006 4:11 AM, Blogger Pragmatician said...

Love this pots as someone who still has vivid nightmares of the Sehvah Beracha week, we were all so tired and after the third or fourth you just saw people were there against their will.
And the drashos, believe me it's not only the women that need to keep themselves busy during the "impressing" speeches. Men are on their cell, or shmooz away ignoring the stares they get from the B'alei Simchah.

 
At 2/21/2006 4:12 AM, Blogger Pragmatician said...

Shevy-I've forgotten how funny you could be!

 
At 2/21/2006 9:08 AM, Blogger Moochy said...

Shevy, umm.. Funny.. well.. with good co-ordination, they can fix the pidyon haben with the next sheva bruchos too.
Slik, only 3??? why are you depriving us? was yours that bad???
Shy, Sounds like you blush when they do that ;)
Prag. Nightmares??? :) Men I think have less of a choice since they are facing the "talmud chuchom" ;)

 
At 2/21/2006 5:17 PM, Blogger MUST Gum Addict said...

I was at my wife's relative's sheva brachos this week in Williamsburg. The men on one side (and the chosson too), and the women on the other side of the mechitza (with the kallah). I didn't even see the kallah.

I only knew my father-in-law who sat next to me, but we had sat together at the wedding the week before and had run out of things to talk about. We were the only ones in the entire room with a "regular" black hat and I felt like I was the goy from the 5 Towns.

I only understood half of the drashas as my yiddish isn't that great (my grandfather used to tell my wife, who is fluent, to "learn me yiddish").

I can't even imagine a whole week of this stuff.

 
At 2/22/2006 6:12 AM, Blogger Pragmatician said...

Moochy-With nightmares I was referring to the week after my wedding, I was tired and had no patience for the overused smiles everyone was giving me. And had no appetite either!


Must Gum-I'm a master at finding excuses for not attending! Leave me a note if you need one

 
At 2/22/2006 8:55 AM, Blogger Moochy said...

Kiddush: Umm.. choose to sit next to someone who believes in George Armani.
(well, that can be weird if you would go around sniffing people at the schmo-goes-bored.
Must. just for the gum you can be a "goy" ;) let alone the hat, are you sure you not a shvartzeh? ;)
Asking: At least the scenery was colorfull.
Prag: "overused smile" I know what you mean, similar to the one you get by the stewerdess as you get off the plane ;)

 
At 2/22/2006 12:25 PM, Blogger Parsha Potpourri said...

There is an old, cute line as to why there must be drashos by Sheva Berachos -

The Gemora says that whoever has hana'ah from the seudas chosson v'kalla without being m'sameiach them is in big trouble. So we're afraid that some people will come, fress on the food, and ignore the chosson and kalla and we want to save them, so we have drashos ... which will make sure that nobody is considered to have had hana'ah from the event!!

So you'll ask didn't the first drasha do the trick, why do we need a 2nd one? To make sure the 1st darshan doesn't have hana'ah either! Note that nobody has yet to explain the need for more than 2. :)

Come check out my blog and enjoy...

 
At 2/22/2006 7:57 PM, Blogger Parsha Potpourri said...

None taken. Cute point. But at least there's no mechitza by mine :)

 
At 2/22/2006 8:51 PM, Blogger David_on_the_Lake said...

All of my sheva brochosen..were in nice restaurants..inmtimate setting..no mechitza..and few speeches..
At least in my hazy recollection...

 
At 2/23/2006 3:20 PM, Blogger Open Up! said...

david i didn't know you were so "modern"...no mechitza?

 
At 2/24/2006 9:23 AM, Blogger Moochy said...

OTD Thanx, but for Chusson Kallah, maybe some are enjoyable and some are just OKAY, the few others are a waste, especially the first one, like who can stay up cheering everyone like "Chillin" said, you are still busy impressing people who come to see if the new couple looks happy, DUH!!!
Special:
Just wait and see, if you wont be like that ;) I mean , you just gonna love him sooo sooo much....
Parsha: Good one.
I did see your blog, so tell me are you usually the first baal darshan or the second?
Slik, I kind of agree (as always).

David: I always knew some people are lucky..
Open: are you Chasidish?
Chillin : Yeah I love the advice of the youngsters, like the one who got married right a week before this couple, and he already knows everything....

 
At 2/26/2006 2:12 AM, Blogger Open Up! said...

mooochy i'm not chassidish but by most of my sheva brachos we had a mechitza

 
At 2/27/2006 11:17 AM, Blogger Moochy said...

Thanx Human, I will.
Leahla, welcome aboard.

 
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